Gaining Control When You Feel Out of Control

Most of us freak out just a bit when we feel out of control. It doesn’t matter whether it’s the situations and people around us, or our own deep internal feelings that we can’t seem to manage. The very thought that we might be losing control makes us feel very anxious and unsafe. If you…

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Does Your Heart Cry Out to be “Enough?”

One of the most heart-wrenching parts of being the wife of a sex addict is that haunting voice inside your head that accuses you of not being “enough” for him. It taunts you with thoughts that if you were somehow better—prettier, thinner, sexier—your husband wouldn’t have to be ogling every woman he sees. He wouldn’t…

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All Is Not Lost, It’s Just Time to Re-up

Living with a recovering addict is challenging in many ways, but probably the hardest thing of all is having to face another relapse. I have talked with many wives immediately following their husband’s return to old behaviors. The vast majority of them have uttered the same heart-wrenching words, “all is lost, we’re back at square…

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Why Is This Happening to ME, Oh God?

Sexual addiction is painful for everyone it touches. It ruins lives, dreams, and self-esteem—for both the struggler and their spouse. With some healing, the addict may get to the point of being able to acknowledge that their choices helped lead them down this path—but what about the spouse? Why is this happening to her? To…

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Do You Know How to STOP Being Overwhelmed?

Overwhelmed! Are you familiar with it? It seems to be a frequent visitor in our house. The dictionary defines overwhelmed as “engulfed, buried, or drowning beneath a huge mass.” I think that’s a pretty fitting description of the past few weeks I’ve had, how about you? We’ve all been there from time to time. Tasks…

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