Who in the World Holds the Key to your Happiness?

Where are you on the happiness scale? Do the days that you experience joy and happiness outnumber the days you feel sad, depressed or overwhelmed? Or are those happy days a little few and far between lately?

Admittedly, life doesn’t always turn out the way we planned. Sometimes it’s hard not to get just a little bit angry about the way things have unfolded. We didn’t ask to be in this place or deal with the stuff on our plate, but here we are.

Life often seems intent on sneaking up and sucking the happiness right out of us.


What if it really hasn’t been the onslaught of circumstances and struggles that have threatened our happiness? Is there any chance that WE might have had a little something to do with it?

I stumbled on an image on the internet the other day that I can’t seem to get out of my mind. It was a graphic emblazoned with the words “Never put the key to your happiness in someone else’s pocket.”

To be honest, I’ve, personally, been feeling overwhelmed and a bit frustrated a lot lately. I’ve chalked it up to all the tough stuff my husband and I have gone through in the past few years. But what if that’s not the real source of my unhappiness? What if I have unknowingly let someone or something take control of the key to my happiness?


It’s not as uncommon as you might think. Of course, we don’t realize that we’re doing it. Even though we  don’t intend to let it happen,  most of us have given our happiness key away at least a few times in our lives:

• We let other people’s opinions define our worth or value. We only feel happy when their opinion of us is positive. They have control of our key.

• Sometimes we take on the responsibility to make sure everyone around us is happy. Our happiness and well-being is contingent on their happiness. We, inadvertently, put them in charge of our key.

• There have been other times when we’ve given our key to others in exchange for their love, acceptance or respect. They may not even know it, but they hold our key.

• We can even lose our key to the fantasies and daydreams about what we, or our life, should be. Fantasies, by their nature, aren’t even real. They can never bring us happiness, but they can certainly hold our key hostage.


If you want to regain or increase your happiness you must, first, figure out who or what you’ve given your key to.

True happiness always comes from inside us. When we rely on an “outsider” to give us happiness we give them immense power over our life.

The good news is, with God’s help, we can take that power back.


No matter how old, or plain or “ordinary” someone seems, when joy is bubbling out of them, you can’t take your eyes off of them.

Nothing makes a person more attractive than happiness.

When my Dad, who suffers with Lewey Body Dementia, first moved into a nursing home, there was another patient in his wing that you couldn’t help but notice. She was the most joy-filled person I have ever met.

Her circumstances weren’t good. She was wheelchair bound, had growing memory and speech problems, and struggled some days to even feed herself. But, that wasn’t what people saw when they looked at her.

People were drawn to her huge smile and infectious laughter. You really couldn’t be around her for more than a few minutes without starting to smile yourself.

Her life would never be what it had been, but her joy made her unspeakably beautiful. She kept the key to her happiness close to her heart and it showed!

You look gorgeous when you’re happy too! Trust me!


“He will yet fill your mouth with laughter and your lips with shouts of joy.”
—Job 8:21

TODAY’S CHAT: Taking back the key to our own happiness is the best makeover we could ever get! Do you want to join me on that quest? If so, where will you start? Please consider sharing your thoughts with us. Thanks!

1 Comment

  • Janet K. Wheeler

    Reply Reply July 13, 2017

    Since I need to look at this myself, I’ll go first!
    With God’s help, through prayer and journaling, I’m going to try to determine WHAT is making me feel sad. I’m hoping that knowing that might give me a clue as to who or what I have allowed to control the key to my happiness. I want it back!

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